Christmas time is here

It's been awhile since I've put anything on here, but a lot has been happening in the stokes household.  We've been to the beach multiple times, Noah flew on a plane for the second time in his life, and my husband has entered the world of animated Christmas lights!! It started with a Halloween display where he made pumpkins lights up in time to music noah absolutely adored it.  He's been wanting to do a Christmas show to music and this year he finally did it!! He started programming the lights at our fall beach trip and continued until thanksgiving night when he turned it all on! Since then we've had a fairly steady stream of cars each night in our cul de sac stopping to listen.  I'm so proud of my husband and I love watching him plan out next years show and come up with new ideas.  I honestly don't know what we are going to do come January when there are no more lights.  Noah wakes up each morning and the first thing he wants to do is go and push all the buttons to make the lights come on.  My mom says we may have to decorate the basement to ease his distress.  

That kid

So, my son is about to be labeled as that kid, or at least that's my current fear. The kid that's separated from other kids because of what he might do, which right now is biting. He's not a consistent biter and he doesn't do it to be mean, and he only doesn't when he's teething. We have tried every teething toy on the market and I cannot find one he'll take to. I'm not as worried about the biting but a child that bites carries such a stigma. Today I watched a mom's face as my son's teacher told her that her child had been bit by someone in her class, and I watched her face change. I feel so bad that my son bit her child but I feel worse for my son. I watched my brother grow up being labeled "that" kid due to his ADHD. No one believed him or gave him a chance they just assumed he did it or it was ultimately going to be his fault. I don't want this for my child, he's a sweet kid who loves hanging around other kids. At sunday school one teacher has already labeled him and makes him sit by himself because of what "might" happen even though it's happened so infrequently she's already put a label on my child making sure to tell all the other teachers he's a biter an to watch out for him. And while I know that this is such a small drop in my son's little pond, it still makes me so upset because I can't fix it. I'm not there when he does it, I don't know what type of situation he was in that caused the biting. Was it just because his teeth hurt or was it do to some situation that stressed him out and that was what his little brain told him would relieve stress. I know my son can't be liked by everyone but I don't want him to be disliked because of something he did with from what i can tell without malice of forethought. I don't want parents to give us "the" look as we walk down the hall, or to not let their kids come play with my son. It seems silly I know, but it still worries me.

Pumpkins!

Today was pumpkin day. Well really everyday since my son has discovered pumpkins is pumpkin day. My husband decided to go a little nerdy this year and use his dancing christmas lights to make pumpkins sing. But that's a tale for another post. Today we took Noah to pettit creek farms in cartersville. Last year when we took noah to a pumpkin patch, he was fairly immobile and quite content to sit amongst the pumpkins and pound on them. Oh what a difference a year makes!! This year he's mobile, independent, and talking. All pumpkins are "pao pao", and he's quite good at making moo cow noises. Enter in pettit creek farms, it fit perfectly with our sons current obsessions. Not only did they have farm type animals, but also a hayride, bouncy house, corn maze and of course pumpkins!! The hayride was a stupendous hit, Noah just kept saying choo choo and pointing at all the animals and making his O face. He was able to feed the animals as well as throw food at them, which was awesome since throwing things is another current favorite for him. After the hayride it was off to the bouncy slides with a pit stop to feed the goats and sheep along the way. Noah felt quite independent being able to hold his own cup of food for them, although those goats and sheep were quite pushy and the curly ram was the definition of a bully. We jumped in our first bounce house and meandered through the corn maze, discovered tractors and last but not least PUMPKINS!!! Funny thing though his favorite pumpkin was a fake one made to look like a house that he had a grand time playing in with all the "big boys". To round out our country pumping trip we of course had to eat at the cracker barrel, where my son feasted on mac and cheese, chicken, rice apples, and hash brown casserole. All and all it was a great trip and I can't wait to watch this family tradition grow as our family does. Although as per usual my favorite parts of the day included watching my husband and son walk hand in hand through the corn maze, and seeing the two of them sitting on the rocking chairs outside cracker barrel sharing neccos which come to find out was something Casey and his dad used to do when he was a child. I just love to see the memories my husband makes with our son and I love that some of those memories are passed from his childhood as well.

We made it!!

Today starts the first day of our mini vacation to the beach!! And let me tell you after the day we've had there were a couple of times I thought we just weren't gonna make it. Our morning started out great, the bug slept till like 8:30, we had most of our stuff packed and ready to go, and I had my travel outfit out. Should have known because I felt so well organized that something would go wrong. It started with us forgetting the beach house keys and ended with us driving through torrential downpours while I faced backwards in the seat in an attempt to keep my son from screaming and further stressing out my husband. Then we had to stop and get gas with thirty minutes left in our already severely delayed trip. Also, we had to do a diaper change with no changing station. Which meant casey held up noah in mid air while I quickly stripped him and wiped the pertinent parts and threw the diaper back on somewhat straight. Then he pooped and all diapers in the diaper bag were gone which meant I had to contort my fat arms in ways it shouldn't bend to retrieve diapers out of the suitcase, which was of course at the bottom of the mountain of stuff we have to pack now because we have a kid.  So eight hours later we made it to the beach!

School days!!

A while back Casey and I made the decision that come fall we were going to put Noah in the weekday education at our church.  At the time this decision was twofold, one my son desperately needed some socialization at the time this decision was made, and two I just needed a little me time to grocery shop or just have a quiet brain moment.  Judge me if you want I don't mind, at least I'm honest in my endeavors to be a mommy.  I also know that there are people out there who are far more blessed than I in the teaching department and I want my son to learn as much as possible from a variety of sources and people. Now since this decision has been made my son has blossomed from "that kid" you know the one who cries and screams when you leave him somewhere to the kid who smiles and says "bye" when you drop him off.  So now my little mama heart was again questioning did I make the right decision for my son or a selfish decision for me?? Well let me tell you after the excitement my son exhibited to get through those double doors and into his class, we made the right decision!! Noah had a great time at school his first day, and I got a good report that he didn't cry once.  He made an adorable picture and his face when he saw me was probably the highlight of my day.  He of course then proceeded to trip over someone's shoe and face plant but all and all I think my son is going to love his baby education!

Just an ordinary day

I've gotten into the habit of just writing about milestones in my family's lives. The big events, the wow moments of life, forgetting that life is made up of many more ordinary moments than extraordinary moments. So today I'm going to tell you how a typical day in the life of the Stokes goes. My son wakes up anywhere between 730 and 815. Usually he lies in his bed talking and singing songs to himself and his animals. I just lay in my bed listening to him and smiling. When he's ready to get up he stands up and starts saying mama and that's my cue.  Out of the bed I hop and into his room I go.  Someday see want out immediately other days he walks back and forth in his crib telling stories and throwing his animals at me.  Once we are out it's time to get down and either read a book or two or go find daddy in the bed.  It's quite a sad day when daddy is at work and not in the bed.  Then it's time for diaper change which is Noah's cue to pitch a fit and then downstairs we go.  First we let the dogs out then it's time for a drink and first breakfast.  First breakfast must be mobile as Noah likes to walk around the house making sure everything is still good.  After first breakfast we have to check out the outside world, then after about thirty minutes or so real breakfast can commence.  Now some days we head to the gym in the morning, others we play inside/outside, or Noah goes in the hiking pack and we take the dogs on a "w" word.  Sometime between 11 -1230 Noah's ready for a cup of milk and a nap.  Naptime is anywhere from an hour to two hours.  Then lunch after nap, now depending on if errands need to be run depends on whether we eat lunch out or at home.  Afternoons consist of playtime or pool time, and of course more reading.  The kid became a book lover while we were in Florida.  Dinner is usually 6 - 630 then bath night time clothes and if Casey's working we hang out and wait for daddy to get home then it's bedtime. So there ya have it a day in the life of our little bug!!

Father's Day

So I know this post is extremely overdue, but I've been pondering what to write for a while and I'm still not sure.  I thought about leaving a Facebook post for my husband on Father's Day letting him know how amazing he was, but it felt awkward and forced mainly because everyone was doing it. Part of me wondered are you wanting to write something to be like everyone else or do you truly want to say something about the father your husband is? So, needless to say I waited and waited and waited.  But now at 11 something at night in July I've decided to write about the father my husband is, isn't and will someday be.  My husband is not my dad nor is he his own dad though I think he and my dad share more commonalities.  He is his own father figure, something I'm extremely proud of him for being mainly because I know how hard it's got to be.  My husband knew exactly the kind of dad he wasn't going to be, exactly the kind of husband he was t going to be as well.  So how when you know what you don't want to be do you figure out what you do?? Casey never seems to look to other men for guidance on how to be a father to our Noah, he just is.  He seems to have his own ideas which sometime don't mesh with mine but then again who said they had to right??  But he loves his son and that little boy adores him, I think there's a reason little ones say dada before mama.  Because those dads are their little hearts their little role models.  Noah walks around the house saying dada when Casey's not at home.  His newest thing is when I get him out of bed in the morning I get a quick snuggle then Noah wants down.  He'll play in his room for a while but eventually he toddles his way into our room and immediately wants up on our bed where his daddy is. The way his face lights up when he sees his daddy and proceeds to fall face first onto his chest for a hug just reiterates how well God chose the father for my son.  When Casey isn't home Noah sits on the bed looking forlorn and whimpering waiting for his daddy.  He then proceeds to hit the pillow like they're hiding his daddy somewhere! It's quite humorous.  So to my husband the father of our son.  You are the best person to raise this little bug of ours.  You may have felt lost and useless in the beginning but this little boy loves you completely, and his mommas pretty fond of you too. 

Band aids and boo boos

With possible major changes coming down the pipes at work I am yet again contemplating where else I could find a job.  I love my job and the people I work with, but management is starting to put some changes in place that's going to hinder me doing the job I love which is taking care of kids.  Pediatrics as a specialty seems to be going the way of a track tapes.  An outdated commodity that is a perfectly good notion but no one wants the financial responsibility of outfitting a pediatric friendly area.  So now begins the what would I do instead, but to tell you the truth I love what I do.  Being the nurse for my moms sports camp this week really brought it home for me.  I love taking care of little people.  Granted this week has mainly been ice packs and band aids, but I love it!! I love hearing their little voices and their stories and how they just want a little attention and then they're ready for action again.  I tell my husband that I would love to work for a design firm being an errand girl.  You know that person you see who's out buying the last essential pieces, or the one who's the the mission to find that perfect piece to finish out a room.  I think it would be sooo much fun, especially since I love to shop and wander!! But I have to ask myself could I do that forever?? Would it still be fun if I did it everyday?  Taking care of kids is fun for me,  I'm just tired of the politics and the propaganda.  The pretending they care about staff when what they care about is a bottom line.  I became a nurse to take care of kids not to help my managers numbers look good.  So I ponder again what to do when I grow up??

Memorial Day

Every year boating season kicks off on Memorial Day for our family! This year held special meaning as we not only celebrated the men and women who have fought and died for the family, but watched our son enjoying his boat day thanks to those same men and women.  Noah was dressed for the occasion of course, I love putting him in his summer rompers.  I've always felt that dressing up for the holidays is important, part of me feels like it helps people to remember why we celebrate if they see my quintessential little American boy with his blond hair and blue eyes strutting his red white and blue. As Noah gets older I want him to have an understanding of why we celebrate holidays, and to always remember the men and women behind those holidays.  This includes many of his relatives, and while none may have given their lives for my sons freedom most led lives affected by the times they went through.  So in honor of the men and women who fight so bravely for my sons freedom, here he is learning to enjoy that freedom.

The day to day

Sometimes I get so busy trying to capture the big moments in my sons life I forget to pay attention to the small moments the everyday moments.  Like the way he reaches out his hand for me to hold it even if it's just to walk around in a circle in our house, or how he laughs whenever you rub your head on his belly.  I don't want to be that mom who's so busy trying to capture the big moments in my sons life that I forget to enjoy and memorize the everyday moments.  I've been trying to leave my phone places where it's not constantly in reach, so that I can be more in the moment with my son so that our memories are in my brain. Not just on my phone which could blow up at any moment.  It's hard though I find I have to just leave my phone by my bed and just not touch it.  We've become such a technological people we've forgotten what it's like to just sit back and just watch.  Watch the wonder and amazement that crosses your sons face when the breeze blows his hair, or when a bird chirps as it eats from the feeder.  So today I'm going to enjoy the mundane and the everyday.

Mother's Day gifts

So this year Mother's Day fell on my son's fifteen month birthday, which in and of itself was a pretty cool gift. My husband however true to form had other tidbits up his sleeve. Mother's Day always falls on a Sunday which until I became a mother was no big deal. I was happy to work it so that other mothers could be off and enjoy their day. Well now it's my day and I found myself kind of sad leaving my boys to do things while I went to work. So, imagine my surprise when I look up from doing something at work and their stood my husband!!!! Then I look down and the best gift ever peeks his head around the corner in the form of my little boy holding a balloon he picked himself and a single red rose. He saw me I saw him and his face just lit up like a million little fallen stars, and off he toddles toward me hands in the air booking it for all he's worth right into my arms for a big hug. That memory is one of the best I have so far of mine and little man's time together. It was just that perfect moment when you realize just how great being a mom is, and not just any mom his mom. It's that moment I want to be able to remember forever. Even when I'm old and gray I pray the Lord will let me hold onto that one memory if no other. Memories are precious in my family, we watched my grandmother have her memories ripped away one by one due to alzheimer's and everyday I wonder will I get to remember these days with my son??? I hope I do I hope I remember every little thing if not in clear detail in that hazy way some memories start. With fuzzy details and faces that become clearer and clearer until you find yourself standing there just remembering. But if nothing else I pray I am left with that one moment in time when that little body leaned around the corner holding a balloon and a single red rose and nothing shone brighter then his smile when he realized that I, his mom, was sitting there arms outstretched just waiting for him. That moment there was no camera no pictures no distractions just me and my little boy and a love bigger than any I could have dreamt about.

Mother's Day

Mother's day is one of those days that growing up I never really understood. Now as a mother of just one I'm starting to grasp just why we should celebrate moms not just one day but every day. Being a mom is hard, so very very hard. I never realized all the things my mom probably gave up to be a mom to me and my brother until I became a mom. Now, I realize this sounds like I hate being a mom, but I don't I love being a mom because what I lost in being just Katie married to Casey I gained so much more in being Noah's mom. Everyone says there mom is the best, but here's what I know my mom was the best mom for me. As much as I sometimes wanted someone's else's mom to be mine, I wouldn't trade her now for anything. She was and still is the best mom for me. I don't think anyone else's mom would have done. So, do I think my mom is the all star of every mom out there probably not but she's my all star and right now that all that matters. And she's Noah's all star, somedays more so than I am, but I'm ok with that. I've learned in Noah's short 15 months that grandmother's have a certain status in their grandchildren's lives and I've come to realize it's a good thing. That status and love probably takes away all the little nicks and cracks we put in our momma's hearts growing up. I know I've broken my mom's heart a time or two and I'm sure noah will break my heart as well someday, I only hope and pray that I handle it with the grace and dignity my mom always presented to me.

Gone but not forgotten

In this technological day and age you can do almost anything via your phone computer or tablet, including updating said phone or tablet without ever having to to plug it up. Ahhh the joys and woes of the technological age. Moving on though since I don't have to hook my phone up to my computer to update it anymore I don't mainly because I hated my office area, it made me cringe and want light a match to it every time I walked in. So i just didn't go in, apparently for 8 months according to the apple store. My phone crashed burned and died Saturday and I about crashed burned and died with it when it finally sunk in it couldn't be saved. Eight months of Noah's life I thought I had lost in the form of a multitude of pictures and videos. I also realized that I was losing some important moments in his life and at least 3 holidays!!! To say I was devastated would be an understatement. However, all was not lost Casey and I had started remodeling our office to make it more functional and organized, two of my favorite words and the end result is awesome!!! So, even though I had to have a brand new phone I will not have any problem walking into my awesome office space to plug it up and download my photos and videos to my computer and external hard drive. Good news though while I may have lost a lot of videos my pictures did wind up in the iCloud, thank you apple!! And luckily most of my videos had been sent to other people and they had saved them because lets face it my son is pretty stinking cute, so I've got them back as well. Moral of the story keep your office organized and remember to plug your phone up to the computer at least once a month.

Here comes Peter Cotton Tail

So, I realize it's May and Easter was in April, but I found myself slacking on the blog once Noah hit one year, and now I'm trying to catch up. Currently Casey is deep in his online class so now's a good a time as any. Easter this year was soo very different than last year. I mean we did little gifts for Noah last year too, but this year we actually got some facial expressions and verbal response this year. Our morning started out with the jelly bean hunt that leads to the baskets. This is a tradition from my family and one that I love and wanted to continue, but instead of jelly beans we did trix because lets face it 8 teeth can only crush so much. We also put things like cheerios and goldfish in Noah's eggs as opposed to jelly beans and chocolate eggs. I actually may continue doing this as he gets older to hopefully prevent him from being such a candy holic like his mother. :) Noah's basket was so much fun to make this year and fairly cheap too. Most of his gifts came from the dollar section of target. I will admit when it comes to toys boys are easy to shop for and have TONS of options, clothes not so much. Guess that's the trade off since girl toys are blah to me but the clothes are super adorable. Once Noah discovered his basket it was all down hill from there. He loves to pull things out and just sit and examine them and how they work. It's such a fun thing to watch, you can almost see the little wheels turning. As per our usual we were late for church, but we made it and it was such a joy to be able to sit through an entire service and not have to rush off to work. I just love our church and am looking forward to watching Noah grow and come to love the Lord in this church. Home was a whirlwind of lunch a mini egg hunt and of course our annual pictures before I had to run off to work. I will say that even though little boy clothes aren't nearly as fun as girl clothes they do make some cute stuff, and Casey really enjoys dressing like his mini me. Please note the bow tie and vest in the below pictures as example a-Z.

It's not easy.... Being a mom

I always thought being a mom would be easy for me, that I would be a natural at all things mommyish.  I mean come on is been a nurse in a pediatric ER for 7 years before I decided to have kids, and people were always asking me did I have kids?  When I would reply no they would say but your so good with kids your gonna be a great mom one day.  Most of the jobs I've had throughout life have involved taking care of others peoples children.  I've done babysitting, nannying, and been a camp counselor to girls of all ages.  I loved it all of it!! My mom was a home daycare provider and she rocked it, and sometimes I helped and we made a kick ass team.  As evidenced by the fact no one died and very few of them bled, well except this one kid but we don't count him cause his nose would bleed if you looked at it wrong.  Then Casey and I got pregnant, and while I was not overly confident I knew that I could handle being a mom.  Then my son came early, my hormones raged and sleep was something to daydream about.  I fell apart in a nano second, everything I thought I could and would do right seemed to go so wrong.  My son was not this happy smiley baby who loved to be swaddled and sleep on his back, and just latched right away.  He was this jaundiced zombie who stunk at latching hated being swaddled and despised sleeping on his back!!  I spent the first six months just trying to stay above water!  Then things got easier he got easier and we developed a sort of flow, and I thought, "YES!! I am good at this".  Then today my son refused to nap for two straight hours, he had his milk, lunch clean diaper, snuggles and even an attempt to let him cry it out that resulted in a choking fit and a snot faced baby.  So I resorted to desperate measures I let the car put my child to sleep, I got a Starbucks, and then sat in my car in my garage and let him sleep.  Yet again thinking what in the world am I doing?? Then it dawned on me all these kids that I was sooo great with they weren't MY kid.  Kids that you see every now and again are easy,  you know their boundaries because their parents have given them to you.  But in this case I'm the parent, and it's up to me to figure out MY kid, and everyday is different.  So today he took a nap in the car I had a Starbucks and then we had a picnic in the middle of the kitchen, and it was good.